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I wrote to my brother that him leaving the company would mean nothing in terms of any productivity being lost. And I was 100% right. Though, its one of those things that he took deeply to heart and is strongly insulted by. Probably the worst thing you can say to a narc. Big mistake.

She always looked at me with suspicious eyes. Like what I said would pass a filter in her mind and would be accepted or not.

This information is priceless. I was decades in and went on painful journey of awareness finally leaving but not completely as I still interact with him. So clueless was I but this is super helpful bc although I’ve physically left the home I still need the narcissist to fulfill certain aspects. Perfect and timely thank you for helping turn the tables!! lol as you were speaking of getting the friends to become my flying monkeys instead of his I realized that’s exactly what I’ve been doing unknowingly and yes 💯 I’ve seen results of this strategy.

Very interesting..

Great explanation and thank you for sharing your great expertise. You are a genius and have helped so many people to understand narcissism ❤

I think we all forget the fact that narcissists don't KNOW the fact that they've harmed someone. When they recieve payback, they think they're the victim.

I managed to keep myself more or less sane during the COVID-19 pandemic by growing organic vegetables. I was fortunate to be able to do this because we at the time lived on a large property and I had the assistance of our one son who lived with us. I was able to grow great baskets of wonderful tomatoes which people could buy or I simply gave away. This was appreciated as at the time fresh produce was either unavailable or cost a premium. During the second year of the pandemic I took a photo of my husband and I and was quite shocked at how much we had aged. Nobody in our home had become sick with covid although I did fall sick and had a low oxygen levels for four very difficult days but the tests came negative. There were many in our extended family were and this took its toll. It is very true according to my own lived experience that even those as fortunate as myself in having a good outdoor activity and the means to keep busy were affected. I was distraught over the difficulty we experienced having to care for my elderly and bedridden mother in a home in Capetown. As a family we did work together taking care of her but it was traumatic for me having to travel to Capetown from Johannesburg during COVID-19 every 6weeks.

Ah! Innovative style

i can feel when my narc is thinking about me and sure enough the text comes.

I think.. the materialise is his way to make himself perfectly attractive in order to find love for himself. He hasnt an ability to just love back. Its like your shouting at the back of a deaf person. Its useless because hes ill or unabled. Its a waste of time and energy and will sap you dry. Its over once you wake up and stop trying..

Thank you.

You won't miss us Sam, but someday we will miss you and your stiff poetic apathy.

Jesus Christ, this IS poetry. "Pinned like so many butterflies."

My 50 year old ex-girlfriend stocks me and shows up to my house unannounced freaks me out covert narcissism… with presence a different voice, the whole 9 yards I don’t answer anymore but it’s freaky. She’s a little bitty thing. I’m a big old dude sorry bro just sharing.

Wow, this speaks to me. I had a serious relationship with a borderline that "ended" 30 years ago. No real closure, it just sort of ended in slow motion. I'm still not over it till this day, which is crazy. She even tried to kill me at one point by having this teenage guy she apparently started screwing around with hit me in a car I was traveling in at high speed with his 4 ton pickup truck. About 10 months after this incident, and before I realized what actually happened, and after going through another guy in a brief relationship, she did try to get back together with me, acting as if none of this ever happened! She only recently has been able to admit to being the cause of the car crash incident. It's just so upsetting when I think of how I was treated after loving this woman so much. We did have a child together, so had to face the reality of raising a child between us, and in that sense have had to remain in touch. I know it must be something psychological in me that makes me still feel stuck in this situation, but it's hard to understand what it exactly is...

*4 months without any contact. I ran away! But I still feel love and sad for him. I'm also a poet. And these words stirred my soul.😭 Thank you, Prof. Vaknin. You couldn't express it better! Susan🇪🇦

Can the binary narcssisst become a malignant narcissist?

I Suffer from EAT

I think you're probably right in that you can't communicate internal experience, people can't really understand what it's like, i for one can't fathom the idea of my identity being so hopelessly enslaved to other people. The fact that you need to constantly get supply or find ways to supply yourself in order to not have a breakdown, and especially while being fully aware of it, it's something I seriously can't grasp. I don't understand why you can't just will yourself into having a stronger identity and disregard the need for supply, i can't understand that you don't have the capacity to experience positive emotions. I understand these things cognitively but i could never see myself in that type of state, and it boggles my mind that my sense of self springs from having a pair of loving parents.

The INTRO is crazy 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😭😭‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️😂😂😂

We must protect the inner child that went through more than we deserved. Once we become of age we are now responsible for our healing those hard parts that many enable. We must become accountable for ourselves and not expect for others to do the same. I’m tired of witnessing “grown” people throw temper tantrums when they don’t get their way. I just go within and honor my own inner child and begin to pray for my continuing healing and peace. I’m a mother so I nurture, I love to cook and feed people as I was once a little girl who at times went without a meal. I guess this part of my inner child doesn’t want to see anyone hungry who’s in my presence. This is just a hamster wheel, some will say it this way and others will say it that way. When you know you’ve grown up is when you’re able to see it in all ways. Thank you for this. ❤

My husband used to cry once in a while because he missed his dead mother....and wondered why she gave him away to foster care when he was a child.

Ultimate Infinite Radical Acceptance Fate Destiny Fortune Legacy Lot in no living LIFE. Lot in life Future in out of time. All of Nothing Stillborn alive. Unrelated Kindred Dichotomy of sameness Reverberation of silence

There is no option. There is no choice. There is no "TO BE OR NOT TOO BE? Me Are. I Am. It is what it is. Que Sera Sera. I exist.

I am terrified by understanding or my knowing , recognizing kindred, shared experience, out of control controlling, controlling out of control, etcetera, ect... expanding restrictions... restrictitive expansion, detailed vagueness...vivid gray. ..break away Perfusion...processing nothing.bbl

I have a history of dating a recent malignant narcissist and a autistic doctor before him. I suspect others I have dated may be on the narcissism spectrum, as well. I don't understand why I am drawn to these men. They were all handsome, intelligent, charming, and educated. I also felt like they all seemed intense and I was intrigued and drawn to that. I don't know how to stop being drawn to these types. Could you please make a video with guidance on this?

I guess the Narcs would want to keep these secrets to themselves bc if targets know how they are viewed, they would avoid the Narc and try to protect themselves by not not engaging or participating in conversations, etc. The honest reveal is insightful. TY, Dr. Sam.

This makes me cry! the entire lecture is a literal description of my experience. I'm so sick of myself.

Thank you for this dr Sam. I was trying to understand the narcissist man i was with but now i see this is making me understand that im no angel either...

i'm being gang stalked

If you found out that someone pretended to love you only for the purpose of using and exploiting you, how valuable would that love be?

*The way he laughs* So unique. 👍🏼😊

It never happens fast enough. Narcs are good at extracting resources from others. Many of them seem to not feel punishment, or they enjoy the negative attention they receive.

I have/had family diagnosed malignant NPD. They are emotional black holes. It's sad but for your own safety you ghost them.

This was so enlightening on so many questions within my self and the resolve of my own history. Thankyou.

I know you get a lot of comments. I hope you read this one. You are one of the smartest people I know on the internet. If you have a chance check out this guy ....The American Homeless Holocaust. I would love to hear your take on this person. hasn't taken a shower in like 88 days. He has a story...I think you will enjoy it...I like to know your opinion. ..

Prof Vaknin, I feel like I relate to much of this strongly, yet I’m definitely not a narcissist. I really struggle with object constancy unless other people interact with me, promoting me to “remember” them. Even family and good friends. I usually need a trigger to put them in my head. Can trauma or other things cause this also?

Thank You Sam.

People with disabilities often have more than one diagnosed disability.

While I’m deeply thankful for the constant enlightenment I receive from you professor this and the video before bring me such a great sense of sadness for the lives lost to the world due to narcissism and it’s effects. It’s profoundly sad.

If a narcissist developmentally arrests at age two, or around that, and if we could remember what it was like when we were two, I have a feeling it would make sense. I can't remember being that young. I feel like it would be disorienting and I think this is what he is describing. I think it is very interesting.

Very informative! Thank you!

How did you gain so much self awareness and consciousness about the fact that this is not the way "human beings" are?

Is the interviewer a narcissistic woman that's trying to find out more about her own kind or I have a very wild imagination 😀

Poetry.

Thank you! This disconnected from the mothership now Trojan horse has strategies to survive from the traumatised 3yo ASPD. Brilliant! 41:54

In one way it is interesting to look behind the curtain of a narcissists mind on the other hand what you say is just very disturbing. I think that's your point, but I doubt whether the message will be understood. People in this age have lost themselves. A narcissist just pales in comparison to what so-called healthy people do to themselves. Let's see how long that lasts.

Thank you, Prof. Vaknin, for making this video. I've watched many of your videos over the past 6 months, and I find this video especially useful in understanding Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Before watching this video and yesterday's video, I felt I only understood NPD in an abstract sense and without a way to relate it to my own experience. Even though you echo many of the concepts in your previous videos, I find this video makes those concepts come to life and really allows one to imagine what living with NPD is like. Thank you for sharing. I don't know if there are many people who could articulate the NPD experience as well as you have.